Is The GOP Tilting At Wingnuts?
In the words of an SEC civil filing against Bernie Madoff’s accountant, David Frehling:
In addition, the S.E.C. filed a civil enforcement action alleging that Mr. Friehling “did not perform anything remotely resembling an audit” of Mr. Madoff’s operation.
Ouch.
But I think that could be tweaked a bit for the current "no numbers needed" GOP super-awesome alternative budget proposal.
The Republicans did not produce anything resembling a budget.
Yes, that’s right, I said there were no budget numbers. None. It’s a pamphlet talking about all the ways to say "no."
There was, however a lovely picture of windmills. (Actual GOP windmills pictured here! Ooooh, I’m tingly!)
Don’t open the document on Boehner’s page, btw, because they forgot to put the PDF tag in properly. I had to google to find a coded one on the GOP.gov page. (PDF)
But no budget figures in their "alternative budget."
Nada. Zero. Zip. Zilch.
Apparently, they’ll be producing them later.
Um, yeah.
That always worked as an excuse for not doing your homework in Miss Goldsworthy’s 8th grade English class, too, didn’t it? "I’ll get that assignment I’m presenting to the class today to you some time next week. But, seriously, I’m so done with it and the numbers are awesome. Magnificent, even. Totally. I’m. On. It."
Epic fail.
They did, however, have some nifty charts. Take a look at this brilliantly distilled essence of GOP:
Have you ever had to sit through one of those masterfully dull, re-imagined "bring in outside consultants to re-invent our business culture" sorts of seminars?
The kind where your company supervisors bring in highly paid outside people to come in and tell you that you should (1) enjoy your job more so that you can (2) be more productive and thereby (3) make your boss more money so s/he can move up the corporate food chain?
And then someone passes out those nifty key chains, coffee mugs, trivets, pens, rulers and other assorted treasured goodie bag awesomeness, all emblazoned with the new business motto which is supposed to make you a more productively awesome worker bee to shore up your boss’s bottom line?
Something like:
H.U.R.L: Happiness Understanding Relationships Logistics
And since everyone in the room is really only there for the pastries and to laugh at the presenters, while envying the fact that these douchebags get paid to do re-imagine this kind of crap, you spend the presentation stifling giggles?
Dilbert-esque, isn’t it?
That’s what the GOP has achieved with this thing. It’s a distillation of why none of these people should ever be in charge of anything important to you.
Seriously, browse through it’s mundane ignominy.
No, I can’t stop laughing either, why do you ask?








Good morning Christy
*giggling away*